How to Help a Loved One Struggling with Mental Health During the Holidays

The holidays can be a joyful time, but they can also bring significant challenges for those struggling with mental health. Stress, financial strain, family dynamics, and societal expectations often amplify existing mental health issues during this time of year. If someone you care about is finding it hard to cope, your support can make a meaningful difference. Knowing how to approach these conversations and provide practical help is key to showing your love and care effectively.

Recognizing the Signs of Mental Health Struggles

Understanding when a loved one is struggling is the first step toward supporting them. Mental health challenges can manifest in various ways, such as:

  • Emotional Changes: Increased irritability, sadness, or emotional outbursts.
  • Behavioral Shifts: Withdrawing from social activities, neglecting responsibilities, or a noticeable lack of interest in previously enjoyed activities.
  • Physical Symptoms: Changes in sleep patterns, appetite, or energy levels.
  • Verbal Cues: Statements that suggest feelings of hopelessness, powerlessness, overwhelming stress, or a lack of self-worth.

If you notice these signs, it’s essential to approach the situation with compassion and a willingness to listen.

How the Holidays Can Exacerbate Mental Health Challenges

The festive season often brings added pressures that can intensify mental health struggles:

  • Unrealistic Expectations: Many people feel obligated to meet high standards for holiday preparations, leading to stress and self-criticism.
  • Financial Strain: Buying gifts, hosting events, or traveling can create financial burdens that heighten anxiety.
  • Loneliness or Grief: For those who’ve lost loved ones or are isolated, the holidays can be a painful reminder of their absence.
  • Disrupted Routines: Changes in daily habits, such as irregular sleep or overeating, can contribute to feelings of imbalance.

Recognizing these challenges can help you empathize with what your loved one is experiencing.

Tips for Supporting a Loved One

When it comes to helping someone with mental health struggles, there’s no one-size-fits-all approach. However, the following strategies can help you provide meaningful support during the holiday season:

1. Start the Conversation

It can be difficult to open up about mental health, so taking the initiative is important. Choose a quiet, private setting to express your concerns.

  • Use “I” Statements: For example, “I’ve noticed you’ve seemed a bit down lately, and I want to help if I can.” This approach feels less accusatory and more supportive.
  • Be Non-Judgmental: Avoid dismissing their feelings or offering quick fixes. Simply acknowledging their emotions can be incredibly validating.
  • Practice Active Listening: Give them your full attention, maintain eye contact, and show empathy by paraphrasing what they’ve shared to confirm your understanding.

2. Offer Practical Support

Sometimes, small gestures can make a big difference. During the holidays, consider these ways to ease their burden:

  • Assist with Responsibilities: Help with tasks like shopping, decorating, or cooking. These activities can feel overwhelming for someone struggling.
  • Invite Them to Join You: Encourage them to participate in holiday activities without pressuring them. If they decline, let them know the invitation remains open.
  • Respect Their Boundaries: If they’re not ready to talk or engage, respect their need for space but continue checking in periodically.

3. Educate Yourself

Understanding mental health challenges can help you provide informed and empathetic support. Learn about the specific conditions your loved one is facing and avoid perpetuating myths or stigmas. The Canadian Mental Health Association (CMHA) emphasizes the importance of education as a foundation for effective support.

4. Encourage Professional Help

While your support is valuable, a mental health professional may be best equipped to provide the care they need. Encourage your loved one to seek therapy, counseling, or other professional services. You might say something like:

“I care about you and want to see you feeling better. Have you thought about talking to a counselor? I can help you find one if you’d like.”

Offering to help with logistics, such as finding a provider or accompanying them to an appointment, can make the process less daunting. It takes great courage to take that first step.

5. Be Patient and Persistent

Recovery and coping aren’t linear processes. Your loved one may have good days and bad days, and it’s important to remain patient. Avoid pressuring them to “snap out of it” or making them feel like a burden. Instead, remind them that you’re there for them, no matter what.

Self-Care for Supporters

Supporting a loved one during the holidays can be emotionally taxing. Make sure to prioritize your own mental health so you can continue to be there for them. This might include:

  • Setting boundaries to avoid burnout.
  • Talking to a trusted friend or therapist about your feelings.
  • Taking breaks when needed to recharge.

Remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup. Taking care of yourself is just as important as caring for others.

Don’t Be Afraid to Seek Help

If your loved one’s mental health appears to be deteriorating or if they express thoughts of self-harm, it’s crucial to seek immediate help. In Canada, you can contact Talk Suicide Canada at 1-833-456-4566 or connect with a local crisis line for support.

The holidays can be difficult for many, but with patience, understanding, and a proactive approach, you can help your loved one navigate this challenging time. Sometimes, simply being there and showing that you care is the best gift you can give.

References:

https://www.samhsa.gov/mental-health/how-to-talk/friends-and-family-members#:~:text=Expressing%20your%20concern%20and%20support,that%20you%20care%20about%20them

https://www.psychiatry.org/patients-families/helping-a-loved-one-cope-with-mental-illness

https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/explore-mental-health/articles/how-support-someone-mental-health-problem